God's Governmental Protection of the Sisters


	Message Seven: God's Governmental Protection of the Sisters Introductory Word In both our family life and in the church life God has a divine, governmental arrangement. Concerning our family life, the Bible says, "For a husband is head of the wife as also Christ is Head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the Body" (Eph. 3:23). Concerning the church life, the Bible tells us, "But I want you to know that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of Christ" (1 Cor. 11:3). First, in practicing the family life, the husband is the head of the wife. Second, in practicing the church life, the brothers are the head of the sisters. This puts sisters in a very difficult place. The Difficulty of the Lord's Arrangement Very few husbands understand their wives, and very few brothers understand the sisters. Yet they all act as the "head" of the sisters. For this reason it is much more difficult to be a sister than to be a brother. The husbands tell their wives what to do, and the brothers tell the sisters what to do. This may be completely Biblical, but it seems to be an unfair arrangement. For the Lord to be the head of all the brothers makes sense, because the Lord understands them. The Lord can tell the brothers, "I know who you are. I know your situation. I understand you." But the brothers cannot say to the sisters, "I understand you." On the contrary, the brothers do not know or understand the sisters' situation. Nor can a husband tell his wife, "I understand you," because very few husbands truly know their wives. It is easy for the brothers to submit to the Lord, but it is not so easy for sisters to submit to the brothers or to their husbands. This divine arrangement causes sisters to confront some difficult matters. This is a practical problem in the family life and in the church life. The sisters are sometimes very spiritual, while the brothers are not so spiritual. After a sister gets married, all of a sudden a non-spiritual brother is her head. How can she then submit to her husband? Even we would ask the Lord, "Why is this so? Why have you arranged it this way?" In the church life it is the same. It seems that if sisters could be elders, they would make fewer mistakes in handling the church. The brothers make big mistakes, and the sisters make minor mistakes. The mistakes that sisters make are not crucial. When a brother makes a mistake it causes the whole church to do something peculiar, and the brother doesn't even realize it. We might think that if the sisters could be the leading ones, the church life would be a better place. However, it is clear that the Lord never ordained it this way. The Lord would tell us, "It is very simple. Sisters, in your family, your husband is your head. And in the church life, the brothers are your head." A sister might want to argue back, "But Lord, my husband doesn't take You as his head." Then the Lord would reply, "That's your husband's business, not your business. Your business is to take him as your head." The Reason for the Lord's Concern About Headship: The Ego Why is the Lord so concerned about the matter of headship? When we are dealing with the matter of headship, we are also dealing with the matter of "ego." If a person's ego is strong, it is difficult for that person to be under someone's headship. The stronger the person's ego, the harder it is for him to take anyone as his head. Why is a woman under the man, and why is a wife under her husband? Why in His government did God ordain things this way? God ordained things in this way because almost all of the sisters have a strong ego. Sisters can be very egocentric. Furthermore, the ego of sisters is different from the ego of brothers. A brother's ego is easier to handle. For example, when a husband and wife argue, in most cases who wins? Outwardly the husband wins, but in reality the wife wins. The wife wins secretly, while the husband "wins" openly. In other words, the wife is wise and clever in the way that she handles her husband. She knows how to win. Wives usually know how to handle their husbands, but not many husbands know how to handle their wives. This is because the sisters' ego is stronger. Therefore in His government the Lord stresses the matter of headship with the sisters. Why does the Bible say that the husband is the head of the wife, and the man is the head of the woman? When we come to the root of the matter, it is not just because the woman has to be under something. It is because there is something particular in a woman's disposition that is very difficult to counteract. The sisters' ego can come out in almost any situation they are involved in. This is why they must be under the proper headship. A sister may look at her husband and think, "He is my head? Who is he, anyway? He is not so spiritual." This is not a light matter. In looking at their husbands sisters will often consider a few items. "In reading the Bible, my husband is better than I am. In preaching the gospel, no doubt he is effective. With praying in the meetings, he receives a lot of amen's. And with his practical serving, he is capable. The only thing is, he doesn't know what is going on. And I know." This last item becomes the sisters' argument. "Out of all these items, I have the one thing that is most crucial: my husband doesn't see what he should see, but I see things clearly." A sister may insist on this and talk about this with her husband until he submits. Then she feels that she "made it." After this, she may even tell her husband, "You are the head." Very often sisters tell their husbands, "Why aren't you being the head?" When a sister says this, who is really the head? This reveals that she is actually very opinionated. If she were not opinionated, if she were not so strong, wouldn't her husband naturally take the lead? The reason why he is not the head is because his wife has already subdued him. This kind of interaction may be difficult to speak about, but it is very realistic. It shows that basically, the sisters have a stronger, more stubborn ego. Headship is for the Sisters' Protection The reason why the Lord asked the sisters to submit to their husbands in their family and to submit to the brothers in the church life is not for the sake of order alone. It is more for the sake of the sisters themselves. We could say that from one angle, the submission of the sisters is for a testimony of God's governmental arrangement. But from another angle, and more importantly, this is the Lord's protection to the sisters. For example, Christ is the head of every man. When brothers exercise in the church life, they must learn to say, "We are under the headship of Christ." When they say they are under the headship of Christ, is that just a matter of order, or is that for their protection? If all the brothers learned the lesson, "We are under the headship of Jesus Christ," wouldn't they be well-protected? Wouldn't the brothers grow well, and wouldn't the church life become healthy? When God in His governmental arrangement has an order, it is not for the sake of order alone. His arrangement is for our protection. Many times a sister will complain to the Lord, "I don't believe this is right. I'm much more capable than my husband. Why should I be under him?" Often a sister is truly more capable and more knowledgeable than her husband. Yet the Lord would say very simply, "As a wife, your husband is your head. In the church life, the brothers are your head." If a sister argues back, "Lord, how can this be?" the Lord will say, "Because of you. This is for your sake. This is for your protection." We must realize that God's divine governmental arrangement is not just for the sake of "order." His arrangement is for the sake of protection. Dear sisters, it is good to realize that the Lord has done everything to protect you. Try to have this realization in your family life. As you observe your husband, realize that whether he is capable or not, whether he is spiritual or not, he is for your protection. The reason he is there is to protect you. Then also have this realization in the church life. You may see elders who to your observation don't know what they are doing. It may seem to you that every time the Lord is doing something, the elders are a frustration. But this is the Lord's arrangement for your protection. The Lord knows the situation better than you do, and He sees everything from a much higher view. Whatever you may think about them, the elders are there for your protection. Protection Results in Both Freedom and Limitation Sisters, as you are exercising in your family life and church life, you should have a deep sensation, "I need this arrangement for my protection. I don't need what I consider to be freedom." When you are under the proper protection, you do have genuine freedom. The freedom and liberty you have in your spirit comes from the healthy protection. You should realize, "I'm free before the Lord, and I can function so freely in my spirit, but I also remember that I need the protection. When I make a decision, I can fellowship with my husband, and I can fellowship with the brothers. This is for my protection." Do you realize that protection and limitation are the same thing? At the same time the brothers protect you, they also limit you. It is impossible to be protected and yet not limited. When you desire the healthy protection, you also must take the limitation. Sisters, this is the Lord's arrangement for your sake. Because your ego is so strong, He limits you and protects you by His governmental arrangement. If you realize this, you will be blessed. Protection is Crucial for Healthy Growth The Lord would say, "I know how sisters are built. Because sisters are built with such a strong ego, I desire to render them the proper protection." Sisters, once you see this, you will appreciate your husband, and you will appreciate the brothers in the church life. You will say, "Praise the Lord for my husband. He doesn't always fit my taste, but he's my husband, and he is my protection. And praise the Lord that I'm in the church life. I have all these brothers. They may not always seem to be that spiritual, but they are for my protection." This is the protection that the Lord has given the sisters. You should treasure this protection and realize how crucial it is for your healthy growth. For any sister to grow, for any sister to follow the Lord properly, she must have this protection. The more protection she has, the better. Headship is a Living Matter, Not a Doctrinal One Sisters, when you consider your family life and the church life, you have to realize that God has no intention just to put you under something. No, God desires to protect you so that you can become normal, healthy, and useful. He desires to protect you so that you can grow well, function well, and become a blessing to the church life. Don't take the matter of headship in a doctrinal way. Take headship in a living way. Realize that in the church life, you are under the brothers. However, the Lord Jesus is also here with you. You can be so free. You can exercise, pray, gather together, and preach the gospel. You can even start home meetings, and ask your husbands to back you up. By no means is this wrong, and by no means is this "not taking the headship." However, if at some point your husband tells you, "You probably should not do this right now," then you must know how to stop. That is to be under the headship. Your exercise can be so free and living, but you realize that you need the protection of your husband's headship. This is to take the matter of headship in a living way. A Sister Should be Careful - Her Ego May Grow to Include Her Husband We have seen that headship is a protection from our ego. The ego can grow and develop over time, and this is true especially after marriage. A woman's ego can grow to include her husband. If a woman is not in the church life, after she is married she may force her husband to live the way she wants. She will try to force her husband to be successful and make a lot of money. In the church life, the ego is more dangerous. When a sister gets married, she wants her husband to become, if not an apostle, at least an elder. Sisters desire to marry spiritual brothers. But after they get married they find out that their husbands are not spiritual. With every husband, which person is most aware that he is not spiritual. It is his wife. His wife sees everything in his daily life, and she will eventually question his "spirituality." Yet at the same time a wife can push her husband. A married sister will push her husband because she wants him to be more manifested and more useful. A sister can easily demand that her husband become a certain kind of person. It even seems that she didn't marry a man, she married her idea of that man. She married what she hopes about that man, and she utilizes him to attain her hope. This shows the strength of her ego. Her husband becomes a utensil for her to attain something. Sisters may feel, "I was born a sister. I cannot be an elder, but I can at least make my husband an elder." Sisters, how many of you hope that your husband eventually will not be what he is now? How many of you wish that your husband was more prevailing and more useful? You may want your husband to be an elder. If he already is an elder, you may want him to be more manifested. You may unconsciously hope your husband would be like "brother so-and-so" and would give messages, but your husband can't. In your thoughts, you and your husband are one person. When your husband has a certain kind of attainment, you also have the same attainment. If your husband becomes an elder, you become an "elderess." You may even try to maneuver behind the scenes. Be very careful of this. Don't be condemned by this word, but realize that it is a common psychology. You should expect your husband to grow, love the Lord, and even be manifested and useful to a certain degree. But if you expect him to have a specific place or manifestation in the church life, this shows you have something within you that is not so pure. Instead of your husband becoming your protection, you will become a frustration to the church. Sisters, you must be careful. This is why the Lord says that your husband is your head. Don't push your husband. Don't try to reform him or transform him. Don't try to make him into someone or something he is not. You married him. You didn't marry a hope. You didn't marry an idea. Again, you must be careful. You need to see the Lord's arrangement. If you have wisdom from the Lord, you will say, "Lord, thank you. You gave me this husband. If someday by Your mercy he becomes a leading one, then I am thankful. But if he is never that manifested, Lord, I'm just as thankful. If he gives life in the meetings, Lord, I thank You. But even if he never seems to give life, Lord, I still thank You. This is the brother I married. Thank You for giving him to me." This doesn't mean that you don't care about your husband's growth or usefulness. Surely you should stand with him, encourage him, and help him grow and be manifested. But you must realize you are not pushing him. You can grow with him and encourage him, but do not handle him. He is your head, and you are not his head. Sisters, be peaceful. As a sister, you are not only under the protection of your husband, but you are also under the protection of the brothers and the protection of the Lord. It is marvelous to be a sister. There is no need for you to struggle. Rather, pay attention to life. Pay attention to being in the Lord's presence. If you learn to be in life and in the Lord's presence, your husband will gain the spiritual profit from you. Then your family will become a real blessing to the church life. Concluding Word Now we can understand God's divine, governmental, arrangement. Why does God arrange things for you dear sisters to be under the headship of your husband and the brothers? For your protection. Sisters, take the protection. Your operation in the church life needs to be under this protection. Learn to stand with the brothers in the church. Learn to stand with your husband, whether you think he is spiritual or not. Don't try to force or manipulate your husband. Realize that he is for your protection, and all the brothers are for your protection. For this, may we all receive the Lord's mercy. To purchase the book Sisters' Messages